NeW StEp

Dah one month tak post pape pun kat blog ni. Macam blog ni berpuasa juga je. Hehe.

Walaupun hanya one month, macam2 dah berlaku pada saya, macam2 telah saya lakukan.

Walaupun apa yang saya lakukan tu hanya small things.

But, tu la kehidupan saya, bukan penuh dengan dramatik atau benda2 yang besar.

Saya suka macam tu, not to much, just simple.

Have problem sama macam orang lain. Tak pelik pun.

Namun,masih blom complete, banyak lagi perlu dilakukan untuk kehidupan saya yang simple ni.

Saya nak ada kerjaya, rumah sendiri, kenderaan sendiri, dan membina family saya sendiri:-)

InsyaALLAH, dengan izin tuhan, saya mempunyai kehidupan yang saya harap kn:-)

Funeral Blues

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.



Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message He is Dead.
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.



He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last forever: I was wrong.



The stars are not wanted now; put out every one,
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun,
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the woods;
For nothing now can ever come to any good.

-W. H. Auden-

(p/s : I love this poem, mula tahu semasa menonton movie, Four Weddings and a Funeral. It is a really sad and deep poem)

Something to Think

Ini dialog dari sebuah drama jepun, I keep on thinking about this lines.. Really something..hehe..
Here, I put it in my blog:-)

" The path you are about to follow is probably the right path. So you should be able to go forward without doubts. But if there is even the slightest possibility of regret, it is not altogether a waste to doubt. People are born as small individual, and they continually wish to grow bigger. They have been living their lives wishing to grow bigger and bigger. But is that truly something we need? But what does that not it? As long as we have a free heart, we shouldnt have fear whether we can grow bigger or not. You can spoil yourself, you can be wek. But fundamentally, humans are weak. Although we may be weak... Without stretching ourselves.. As long as we look around us.... the place that is always close to us, is actually the most precious. I hope that you too can find your one and only place in life. "

Nice kan ayat-ayat tu..make you think... And I think, the one and only place in life, is the place we be happy with, we the one we love;-)

aPa YaNG MiRaCLe?

Pada saya, apa yang ajaib adalah apabila seorang lelaki hanya menyintai seorang perempuan dalam hidup seumur hidup dia. Sangat ajaib! :-) Ajaib ini boleh terjadi kepada mana-mana jenis lelaki dalam dunia ini. Samada lelaki yang jahat, lelaki yang baik, lelaki yang teruk (totally jerk), lelaki yang selfish, lelaki yang pemalu, lelaki yang ego tinggi, lelaki yang kaki gaduh, lelaki yang lembut, lelaki yang emotional, dan macam-macam lelaki. Hehe.. Mereka akan berubah apabila sudah jatuh cinta kepada seorang perempuan sahaja dan menjadi lelaki yang hebat:-)

Cuma sebab ia ajaib, tak semua lelaki mempunyai keajaiban ini iaitu dapat menyintai hanya seorang perempuan sahaja, jatuh cinta hanya seorang perempuan dalam hidup dia.

Dan inilah setiap perempuan dalam dunia ini mahukan;-) Tapi tak semua perempuan bertuah dapat mempunyai lelaki yang hanya menyintai dirinya. Tapi saya percaya, perempuan yang memahami erti cinta sebenarnya, akan menemui lelaki ini, yang akan menyintai dirinya sepenuh hati, dan hanya dirinya dalam hati lelaki ini=)

So, saya harap, kepada semua perempuan yang percaya akan cinta, memahami apa itu cinta, dan menghargai cinta akan menemui lelaki yang mempunyai keajaiban ini. Especially to my friends, yani dan mas:-)

To me, I hope saya la perempuan itu dalam hati dia, yang hanya dia cintai dalam seumur hidupnya:-)

Now, I just follow the flow. Tak buat pape tindakan awal pun. Just follow the flow. Be patient. Be cool. Segala masalah yang datang sekarang, terutama kerja yang makin complicated, aku just be cool. Just do it. Just cool.

Go go Aishah..

Fighting........

Dear blog

Dear blog,

this is the place I can be so selfish,

just focus to myself only,

say anything I want to say,

write anything I want write,

feel sad...

feel angry...

feel happy ...

just anytime I want,

Because this is the place I can be so selfish.

Feeling Empty

01. Your name : Rujuk I/C saya
02. Hobbies : I already don’t know
03. Gender : Female
04. Religion : Muslim
05. School/work : Home sweet home
06. Height : dalam range petite
07. Horoscope : Sagitarius
08. Address : earth
09. Email : Rujuk profile saya
10. Your hp no : Rujuk syarikat DIGI
11. Hair color : Black
12. Eye colour : Dark Brown I guess..
13. Skin colour : I don’t know
14. Right or left handed : right
15. Status : Not yet married
16. Siblings : 5
17. Last 3 digit of your mobile no : Rujuk je kat syarikat DIGI
18. When's your Birthday : Rujuk surat beranak saya
19. Favorite place : EARTH
20. Favorite film: So much to list it
21. Tried smoking : Yes.. Very stupid kid that time, so curiousity..
22. Drink alcohol : No.. But I use it on my face “TONER”..
23. Been hurt emotionally : ………………………………………………………
24. Kept a secret from anyone : Yes, so much, and I hate myself if I told anyone about it..


*Favorites*
26. Color : Red, Pink, White, Gold
27. Food : Berlemak, ada rasa lemak-lemak
28. Club : Clubman, new edition of Mini Cooper..
29. Number : 9
30. Cartoons : A lot la
31. Actor : Andy Lau
32. Song : I Love You, You Love Me -Barney-
33. Movie : Hard to choose, so much choices..


*Right Now*
36. Wearing : tee and track
37. Hairstyle : So messy la
38. Looking at: Screen
39. Thinking of : myself, my feelings, my future


*Do You Believe In*
41. Love : I don’t know anymore
42. Faith : I also don’t know anymore
43. Yourself : Depends on situation
44. Ghosts : This is the only question in this world I will never answer, so dangerous
45. Angels : Of course


*In The Last 24 Hours*
46. Worn jeans : Yes
47. Cleaned your room : Yes
48. Cried : yes
49. Met someone new : No
50. Last person I talk to on the phone : My coursemate, she always late come to class


*Love Life*
51. Do you believe in love : I already don’t know anymore
52. Have a secret admirer : Don't know, I don't care
53. Do you wanna get married : don’t know
55. How old you wanna be when you get married: don’t know, maybe not married, I don’t know
56. How old you wanna be when you have your kid: don’t know
57. How many kids do you want : enough to love me, and want me love them back
58. Would you have kids before marriage: Maybe, anak angkat, if I don’t want to get married
59. Do you have a Crush : I don’t know, and I don’t care
60. What do you want most in a relationship: I don’t know already what I want


*This Or That*
61. Pink or Black : Pink
62. Kiss or hug : both, please…
63. Summer or winter : summer
64. Sunny or rainy : sunny
65. Chocolate or vanilla : vanilla
66. Hanging out or chilling : I don’t understand??
67. Music or TV : TV
68. Hamburger or Pizza : ham…bur…ger….
69. Smile or Laughing : I want both
70. Sleeping or eating : I want both too.
71. Mc Donald's or KFC : BURGER KING
72. Silver or gold : accessory, I prefer silver. But dress, handbag, heels, better with gold
73. Sunset or sunrise : Sunset
75. Diamonds or Pearls : Pearls
76. Adidas or puma : FILA
77. Band members or models: x berminat pun
78. Local or international Artist : Depends
79. Sneakers or boots : Sneakers
80. Jack daniels or Chivas : Who is it?????
81. Dunhill or Malboro : DUN…go to…HILL..or….MAL…BOROBORO…kahkahkhakah
82. Clubbing or live music : tak berminat mana pun
83. Johnny depp or Brad Pitt: hmmmmm……….
84. Angelina Jolie or Kate Hudson: Kate Hudson
85. Colossal/epic or romantic comedy: combine both of it
86. BMW or Ferrari : tak nak..too big and too fast.. I prefer like Mini Cooper, or Smart Fortwo
88. Incubus or maroon 5 : don’t care
90. Long haired or bald : I never try being bald..maybe I try..
91. Pop or Rock : Pop
92. Beach or mountain : Both
95. Nokia or ericsson : yang mana yang jatuh banyak kali tak rosak?????
96. 311 or hoobastank : I don’t care
97. Asia or America : EARTH
98. Tattoo or piercing : dah wat piercing
99. Asia or Europe : EARTH
100. Asking / answering : I want both of it in communications

Lepas Geram Jap

aarrrggghhhhhh........................................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
serabut serabut...........................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
stresssssssssssssssssssss.....................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tension................................................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
binggung......................................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
pening................................................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
resah.................................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
gelisah gelisah.........................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sedih...............................................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
penat.........................................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
x faham.......................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mee Bandung Muar

Semalam, I pegi Muar..makan mee bandung muar kat kedai Wah San (kot, tak ingat sangat la).. dalam tu ada gerai Mee Bandung Muar Special Abu Bakar Haripah.. peh, sedap giler.. dah la I ni peminat mee bandung.. tak sangka mee bandung muar kaw kaw sedap...haha.. memang ramai orang datang.. tengok-tengok gambar, ada gambar selebriti dan VVIP yang datang makan.. contoh macam chef wan.. tak sangka kan.. Agong pun pernah datang tau..hebat kan penangan mee bandung muar special ni kan...hehe.. tengah2 makan, nampak penyanyi rock, NASH tu masuk dalam kedai ni..dapat jumpa gak artis walaupun xminat...haha... So, yg belum cuba.. pegi la cuba ek..hehe... kalau dah cuba, datang makan lagi la.. sebab I nak pergi lagi...hehe...

(T_T)

I already betray myself.. I let myself down..I dispointed myself..how stupid and idiot I'm.. Why I do that??????? Why????? I already promise myself, now, I have show my weakness...My stupid weakness... Why AISHAH??????!!!!!! You soooooo stupid doing that..... I hate myself doing that.... I shouldnt betray myself... Now, what should I do hah?????? What surpose I do???? the only way I have, I already betray.. Now, I dont know how.. Why this is happening???? I just wanna run........................run far far away..... than I wanna jerit sekuat hati.............lepas geram semua.....nak... I want... I want that... I want....... oh....God.......Help me....help......................

To Yasmin Ahmad..

This special person, is really meants so much to me.. I will always remember her arts, her works, her special thought about Malaysia, humanity, religion, races.. I adore her... I want to be like her.. doing something really special... This is for her..she is like an angel..

Angel

I have a dream of you I can't defined

You've been on my mind

Don't go

I feel lost, without you by my side

Lost and on my own ooo

Yeah I'm falling for an angel

Angel

Your brightest star is shining next to mine

Every night and day

You know

Stars exploded then they fade away

Then they fade away

Yeah I'm falling for an angel uuuuu

Yeah I'm falling for an angel ooo

Would you please be my babe

Come by and I lay you down

I'm loving when you say I love you too

Won't you please be my honey

I'm sorry that I let you down

Your eyes are breaking my heart in two

Break my heart in two uuuu

Angel

May the one above us keep you safe

For the rest of day

If he knows

How I love the smile all on your face

When you here to stay

Yeah I'm falling for an angel ooo

Yeah I'm falling for an angel yeahhh x 3

(sing by Atilia in OST Talentime)

click here to listen it

HoPe

I hope that our love will last forever,

I hope that we always love each other forever,

I hope that we always be together,

I hope that we live happily ever after,

I hope that we will be strong everything there are the hard time,

I hope that we will married and have children together,

And I still hoping.................

How Long?

How long this love will last? This question I keep ask myself. Semakin lama semakin kerap.

Ini sebab situasi yang kami hadapi sekarang. Kami tidak menjadi seperti dulu lagi. Banyak berubah, tak macam mula-mula bercinta dulu. Rasa hangat cinta tu dah semakin kurang.

Si dia juga sudah berubah, seperti tidak ambil kisah pasal perasaan aku. Dan aku pula memang seorang yang pemendam, menyimpan segala nya dalam hati. Walaupun aku pernah menyatakan ape yang aku rasa, tapi tu hanya 50%. Aku tak dapat luahkan sepenuhnya.

Apa yang selalu dia buat, kini tidak lagi dilakukan nya. Adakah percintaan seperti itu? Semakin lama, semakin hambar. Semakin lama, semakin membosankan. Semakin lama, semakin tiada kesungguhan untuk teruskan perhubungan yang lebih baik.

Aku mahu kan percintaan seperti Noah dan Allie, dalam novel The Notebook. Percintaan mereka sentiasa membara walaupun sehingga tua. Noah sentiasa berusaha membuat Allie, orang yang paling dia cintai, jatuh cinta pada dia seperti mula-mula dahulu. Dia kata tidak semua orang bertuah mempunyai peluang membuat orang yang kita cintai untuk jatuh cinta kepada kita berulang kali.

Percintaan sepatutnya begitu, walaupun sebelum kahwin atau selepas kahwin, ketika muda atau tua. Tapi sekarang, sebalik nya yang aku hadapi. Aku terasa sangat dalam hati, rasa kecewa. Kadang-kadang aku rasa makin tawar hati dengan relationship ini.

Aku tidak tahu samada hubungan ini semakin bertambah baik atau tidak. Jika semakin tidak, aku berkemungkinan akan mengundur diri............................... Aku nak lindung hati ku daripada terluka lagi, aku tak mahu hati aku pecah into hundred pieces again. It really take time to collect all the pieces and put it back as it was....................

HURTS

I'm hurts now.. I just what to run away from everthing.. I just want to go some way that I can forget all my feelings.. I just............

Inside me, I'm crying, I'm crying for so long..no one know, I dont show.. but when I show all of it, I'm the most bad person..

anyone will never understand....

And that make my inside become more hurts...

Please.....please.......please......

FRIENDSHIP

Now, I only have few close friends. As my age getting older, I become so choossy who I will be friend with. It is because of all my experience with friendship.

I only choose person who will be there for me when I am sad or happy. Will understand me, will help me when I needed. Because with this kind of person, I will feels not regret to help, to be with he/she when needed, to understands and be a better friend to this kind of person.

I only reject friends when they not even helping me, understand my feeling or worst, betrayed me. If some of my friends feels that they been rejected, what you have to do is finds your mistakes.

Some people said that they sangat menjaga hati kawan, tapi kawan mereka mengelak dari mereka. Actually, tiada masalah dengan kawan awak tu, but you actually. You thinks you jaga hati kawan, but the real things, it is not. PLEASE OPEN YOUR EYES!

One of my friend, we have been friend for so long. But I can't stand with her anymore. You know why?? because, when she in problems, she will finds me. When she no one else to accompany her, she ask me for favor. But when she is happy, have other friends, she doesnt remember me. When I have problem, she doesnt help me, she didnt try to understand my feelings that time.

So now, I avoid her, and if she talking, or contact me, or in front of me, I just feels "you are not my FRIEND".

To my close friends..trust me..I will always be there for you, as you did and do:-)

WHILE WE CAN

Live while we can,

Laugh while we can,

Smile while we can,

Love while we can.

WeDDiNG

Bulan ni ramai sangat yang berkahwin kan.. Suka kan majlis perkahwinan, terutama nak tengok baju pengantin, pelamin, make up pengantin..hehe.. Teringin la nak join dalam perniagaan yang berkaitan dengan wedding planner..hehe.. Mcm seronok sangat je kalau kerja tu.. Kita berusaha nak semua nampak cantik, sweet dan inviting..hehe.. Kalau selepas habis belajar master dan masih menganggur, berkemungkinan join bidang ni..hehe..

P/S :- Suka kerja yang memerlukan kreativiti..hehe...

Happiness

Recently, saya perhatikan ramai yang sedaya upaya menunjukkan mereka bahagia. Paling ketara di Friendster, Myspace, Facebook or macam-macam lagi. Dengan terlalu banyak gambar-gambar yang menunjuk-nunjuk. Saya tertanya-tanya adakah ini kebahagiaan mereka yang tulen ataupun plastik? Mereka seperti ingin membuat statement, "hey, I'm really happy, eat me!" hehehe...

Yes, gambar boleh tell so many things, but do you think gambar tu boleh bagi tahu pada orang lain yang melihat sama seperti ia bagi tahu awak. Semua orang mempunyai presepsi yang berlainan, hanya yang sekepala berkemungkinan sama. So, bila you nak sampai kan yang you are bahagia, but they may thinks you are desperate ke, or syok sendiri ke, or might thinks you are perempuan yang sangat sosial. Dengan itu, jangan berharap akan dapat feedback baik, dan jangan melenting bila ada yang mengata.

Happiness tidak perlu ditunjukkan kepada semua orang, biar orang yang rapat dengan kamu je yang tahu bertapa bahagia nya kamu. Kebahagiaan yang menunjuk-nunjuk boleh membawa impak negatif, tengok sahaja la artis-artis hollywood yang terlalu menunjukkan kebahagian mereka akhirnya cundang. Seperti Brad Pitt dan Jennifer Aniston, sehingga digelar couple of the year pada saat tu, tapi akhirnya kecundang. Begitu juga, Britney Spears dan Justin Timberlake, Jessica Simpson dan Nick Lachey, Jennifer Lopez dan Ben Affleck. Semua tidak kekal, dan selepas itu, dalam hubungan mereka yang baru, mereka lebih cold down kan.

Di Malaysia pun ada juga kes begitu, dan yang tidak menunjuk-nunjuk, bahagia sehingga kini seperti Nora, Ziana Zain, Sofea Jane, dan ramai lagi. Mereka tahu, bahagia mereka untuk mereka sahaja:-) Tidak perlu tunjuk, sebab orang akan tahu, your eyes can not lie, your happiness akan tertunjuk:-)

I'm back

Dah lama tak buat blog kat sini. Busy sangat beberapa bulan yang lepas. Sekarang dah lega sebab dah cuti semester. hampir 3 minggu dah cuti. Hehe.. Jadi student master sangat busy, banyak assignment perlu dibuat. Setiap pensyarah beri assignment, kalau satu subjek ada 3 pensyarah, maknanya ada 3 assignment. Satu semester ada 6 subjek, huh...hehe..
Sangat berbeza time degree dulu, assignment kurang dari 5 je, kadang-kadang tak ada langsung. So, it take time la nak adapt, terutama nak buat esei lebih 10 pages. Huhu..
Sekarang cuti, nak rehat puas-puas, nak jadi sangat malas.hehe..

Check this out!

P.T.D

Last Saturday, 21 February, saya mengambil peperiksaan khas untuk pengawai tadbir dan diplomatik gred M41. Pada mula nya rasa macam takut nak ambil exam tu, rasa malas pun ada. ( saya seorang yang pemalas! haha.. ) Tapi setelah fikir masak-masak, ( saya tidak tahu memasak! haha..) akhir nya saya kata pada diri, why not you just try.
So, pada pagi itu, dengan rasa tiada perasaan, saya terus mengambil exam itu tanpa membuat persediaan sebelum itu. ( perasan pandai kot?? ) Well, till the end, rasa seronok gak menjawab exam tersebut, sudah lama tidak mengikuti exam seperti ala-ala SPM. Hehe..
Terdapat lima paper yang perlu di jawab pada hari itu. Banyak kan.fuuhhh.. Sekysen A adalah soalan objektif mengenai pengetahuan am mengenai Malaysia dan Alam Sekeliling. Banyak yang saya tahu tapi tidak ingat dan tidak pasti, kebanyakkan pernah saya belajar sewaktu degree dulu. Subjek TITAS, Tamadun Dunia dan Perundangan. Ada juga soalan berkaitan isu-isu terkini serta sukan. Sukan memang saya langsung tak tahu. hehe.. Seksyen B pulak, soalan daya menyelesaikan masalah, sangat senang tetapi tidak cukup masa untuk menjawab. Banyak kena hentam je, hukhuk.. Jika anda memang orang matematik, biasa menyelesaikan dengan laju, memang boleh skor paper ni. Seksyen C, Kefahaman bahasa melayu dan bahasa inggeris. Fahami la artikel-artikel yang diberikan, tetapi paper ini diberi sewaktu pukul 3 lebih setelah menjawab 4 paper. Bayangan kan la otak time tu, rasa tidak sanggup lagi, "cukup cukup!". Haha.. Seksyen D dan Seksyen E, dua-dua adalah esei, satu bahasa melayu dan satu lagi bahasa inggeris. Sudah lama tidak menjawab soalan esei, so tidak tahu la apa nasib dengan paper itu. Hehe..
Semasa di dewan peperiksaan, saya jumpa ramai orang saya kenal. Ramai pelik kenapa saya yang sedang mengikuti pengajian sarjana mahu mengambil exam ini. Jawapan nya, expose! Saya nak tahu pengalaman menjawab peperiksaan ini. Tidak rugi mendapat pengalaman baru kan:-).

M.A.L.A.S

Susah lama tak post blog kat sini. Bukan busy atau tak ada idea nak post apa. Cuma M.A.L.A.S nak taip. haha.... Oh, rasa penat sangat nak taip apa benda pun. (saja bagi alasan..huhu..) Saya lagi suka baca blog orang lain, mengetahui pendapat orang lain, memahami orang lain. Really love it!. My father always told me, that we should always respect anyone point of view, even though we didnt agree with it. So, why not I read all of it, many things I learn from it. Syok la. hehe.. Itu kot menyebabkan saya selalu menjadi pelik di kalangan kawan-kawan saya.haha.. Tak apa, saya suka dengan diri saya ini;-) Dengan itu, alasan saya kukuh untuk menjadi pemalas untuk menaip. (Apa la yang aku merepek ni????)

Did not know who suppose to what?

Here a short story from Petersen (1996), a really good story, I think a brilliant story to explain how people always blaming weaknesses and mistakes to others. But the real things is us, we, who supposed to take any responsible actions even we thinks there are others who could do it better than us.

"This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done, and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it.

Somebody got angry about it because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody would not do it.

It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could done!"


So, which one is you?

YANI

Semalam saya baca my friend nya blog, yani. Ada pasal jawab tag-tag. Interesting lah. So, saya tak tau la apa tu tag, macam kita tau kita di tag.( don't blame me k, I'm new here) haha..
But teruja nak cerita 30 pasal my lovely friend, yani. Yani, cite pasal you ye. hehe..

1) Yani is my ex roomate di kolej pendeta za'ba sesi 2007/2008. We both are final year
students but dia fourth year and I third year.

2) Yani tua 2 tahun dari saya, tapi x nampak macam tua pun dan tak sesuai panggil kakak pun,
so, I awal-awal panggil dia yani tanpa ada title kakak. haha.....

3) She is a workaholic girl la. Always doing her work je. Rajin gak this girl.hehe..

4) Suka kumpul baju kotor banyak macam saya juga, kemudian baru nak cuci..hehe.. Pemalas
kot kami ni. haha.. Tapi Tuhan je tau macam mane penat nya kami cuci semua baju tu. Kalau
tak cuci pakai tangan, kami cuci pakai washer machine, tapi penat gak sebab nak cari syiling
50 sen 6 keping. kahkahkah..

5) She know a lot of my secret when I in love with this guy, and I also know her secret of her
love. Girls secret, k :-)

6) Second semester, bilik kami berseri-seri, our room full of flowers of love, love is
in d'air..haha...comel la..

7) Coffee addicted. She love her coffee! ;-)

8) She got a surprised rose flower fake that she wanted. I know you are happy time tu kan.
huhu..

9) She is a really good friends lah, you can count on her. Trust me (^_^)

10) She has a lot of friends coz she rocks lah, best borak dengan dia ni.

11) Really commitment in her works. I know she can be a good lawyer.

12) She suka baju yang comel, beg yang comel, kasut yang comel, patung yang comel, bla bla
bla...comel... hikhikhik..

13) Yani suka beli cendawan kerepok kat watson. Coz she is a mushroom lover. MUSHROOM,
MUSHROOM (versi frankenstein voice)

14) Yani have best friends, haida, mala and piah. Banyak gak dengar cerita pasal mereka
semua;-)

15) Sangat kelakar dia ni. Ada sense of humour lah. hehe...

16) Sebutan 'wow' dia mmg lain dari lain. And I like it:-)

17) Suka bubur kat kedai ala carte, yani pernah curious gak apa makcik tu letak sampai dia
boleh addict.Hmmmm.....

18) Now, I think, yani ni cepat addicted la. Yani, addict benda baik, xpe tau. Jangan x senonoh
tau. Haha..

19) Dia selalu escape makan, samada lunch o dinner. Sungguh merisaukan. Nasib baik ada hero
ni yang selalu beli kan makan untuk dia. He is yani's hero. Huahuahua...

20) Pernah dia jatuh sakit yang sangat teruk, saya risau gila, tak tau nak watpe, dah la tak
ada kereta nak bawa dia ke klinik. panik gak la sebenarnya. Tak tau la dia perasaan. Yani,
jangan wat macam tu lagi ye.

21) Pernah kena gatal-gatal. Kesian tengok dia garu-garu sana sini. Kelakar pun ada gak. Tapi
tahan gelak je. Huhu..

22) Suka makan maggi yang kering tu campur perisa maggi tu. Pelik dan tidak sihat ye
yani.

23) I know who is yani boyfriend, I know who is yani boyfriend..riang nye..haha..

24) Malam-malam, sebelum tidur, kami ada pillow talks. Best la, rindu nya saat tu.

25) I really miss yani. Rindu bangat sama kamu la.

26) Hah, dia suka baca this section kat MPH mid valley, guest what, me too. Before this, didn't
think there are other people will have that interest too.

27) She love to read novels, mostly from famous author. She have a good taste in choosing a good
novel;-)

28) Suka cerita Prison Break, have a huge crush with the hero. Hehe..

29) She totally love her family. Always take care of them.

30) Finally, Yani is totally rock, cool, lovely, sweet, funny, kind person!

p/s: yani, if ada yang menyakit hati, sorry sangat. Really sorry.

I LOVE MYSELF

Bila dikenang masa lalu, banyak sangat kenangan manis dan pahit. Kenangan manis buat saya tersenyum atau ketawa keseorangan. Kalau ada orang lain perasan, mereka tentu bertanya, bila saya cerita kan kenangan tu, kebanyakan orang akan tidak memahami. SEBAB apa? mereka tidak mengalami nya sendiri kan. Betapa best nya saat tu, perasaan yang tidak dapat digambarkan. Macam rasa diorang memang rugi la tak alami nya. haha..

Manakala kenangan pahit, ada yang buat saya berasa sedih dan sebak, ada juga yang akan buat saya berasa bangga dengan diri saya. Apa ye yang membuat saya bangga dengan diri semdiri? Tentu ada yang tertanya kan. Pada saat-saat itu, saya rasa sangat lemah, tidak berdaya untuk menghadapi dugaan itu. Sampai berkata pada diri yang saya tidak mungkin kuat untuk hadapi nya. Sekarang, pejam celik, saya telah berjaya lalui nya tanpa saya sedar. Sebelum ini, saya tidak yakin pada diri sendiri, tetapi sebenarnya, saya ada kekuatan dalam diri saya yang saya sendiri tidak sedar. Kekuatan itu datang kerana saya sayang kan diri saya.

Tiada siapa akan sayang macam mana kita sayang diri kita. Kasih sayang kita sendiri yang hanya mampu memberi kebahagiaan kepada kita. Kenapa? jika kita sayangkan diri kita, kita tak mahu bersedih sahaja, kita tidak mahu menyakit kan hati orang lain, kita mahu membuat semua orang sayang kita seperti kita sayang diri kita, tentu kita berbuat baik pada semua orang. (Eeee...teruk gak fikir balik..hahaha...) Adakah itu selfish? Hmm, terpulang kepada kamu untuk menilai.hehe..

Aku mau lari

Pernah tak terasa macam terikat sangat, macam terkongkong, tak bebas. Tak bebas untuk buat apa yang kita nak, yang kita impi kan. Tak bebas untuk membuat keputusan, buat ketentuan. Seperti seekor kuda yang terikat pada tiang, yang terpaksa ikut cakap tuan nya. Dan tidak memenuhi kehendak hati yang ingin berlari sekuat hati dan sebebas untuk pergi ke mana saja.

Tertekan betul! Perasaan tu, orang lain tidak faham terutama nya yang membuat kita rasa terkongkong. Sebab perasaan tu kat dalam, kat dalam hati, dipendamkan saja. Jika diluahkan, ia seperti memberontak, penuh kemarahan dan agresif, ini sebab ia sukar dilafazkan dengan kata-kata yang sesuai, ia sangat kompleks dan sukar difahami.

Arrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..........................................................



Aku lari ke hutan, kemudian menyanyiku
Aku lari ke pantai, kemudian teriakku
Sepi... Sepi dan sendiri aku benci.
Aku ingin bingar. Aku mau di pasar.

Bosan aku dengan penat,
dan enyah saja kau, pekat!

Seperti berjelaga jika aku sendiri
Pecahkan saja gelasnya biar ramai
Biar mengaduh sampai gaduh

Ahh.. ada malaikat menyulam jaring laba-laba belang
di tembok keraton putih
Kenapa tak goyangkan saja loncengnya?
Biar terderah,
atau... aku harus lari ke hutan belok ke pantai?

(Puisi Rangga dalam movie ' Ada Apa Dengan Cinta?')

We WeRe BoRN To LoVe!

We were born to love!
We were born to love..
We were not born to suffer.

The 20th Century that has been created by irresponsible adults, is filled with conflict and deceit.
We were not born to suffer.

There are times when we will meet people who are heartless, and we will feel like hitting them from behind.
But we were not born to hurt others.

There are times when we will meet people who are heartless, and we will feel insecure or stifled.
But we were not born to hurt others.

Sometimes, we create another person inside us.
Perhaps that is just a way of escaping from pain and suffering.
Perhaps we are only preparing ourselves for escape.
Shutting ourselves in our home and running to another place, In order to talk to that other person, the friend inside us.
That is why no one is ever alone.
Everyone of us has a friend, the other person inside us.

There are times when we think that friend is bad company, that he is cowardly and cruel.
But the reality it is different.
The one that is cowardly and cruels is not our friend, but ourselves.

Why? Because in truth, the existance of that friend is created by us for our own sake.
That is why we have to part with that wonderful friend.
If we don't it so, we will always be dependent on that other person inside us.

Well then, when will that happen?
It will happen when we meet the person we love.
When we give up loneliness, sorrow, pain and the person inside us for that person we love.

So, let's go look for the one we love.
Someone we love whom we can talk to about anything, to laugh with, to cry with, to hold each other, to kiss and have sex with.
Someone from whom we can get courage from, and to whom we can give courage in return.
The only reason we were born is to love!

(from japan drama series 'S.O.S' strawberi on the shortcake)

AISHAH

My name is aishah. Well, after a while I decided to post a blog. Before this, I just not so sure do I should write blogs or not. Coz, I'm a person who not easily to pour out my feelings, my opinions, my thoughts or my ideas. I just could not do it easily. What I have said to others are mostly not really what I'm really want to say. It is funny right?.

Maybe because I'm afraid, afraid to show who I am really are, afraid to make mistakes and then I end up hating to myself, angry to myself. It's better to keep inside, safely.

But now, I think why not I write it in this blog. I think it is ok. Well, to everyone who reads this blog, please dont think to much and hate me. Hehe..